Scudfish

Don’t diss this! Hot balls on cold marble is sweet…

 I had a lot of fun but I didn’t get laid very often.

1. “Come on, Steve… Let’s honeymoon on Brokeback Mountain!”
2. “Guys, let’s play strip poker!”
3. “Whenever I see you, I just want to groom the hairs on your back.”
4. “Your man-weapon IS bigger than my man-weapon!”
5. “If I could, I would breastfeed and snuggle my horse back to health!”

The fucker that designed this road should be shot!

The upside was that she baked an amazing banana loaf and that she could deep-throat a bowling pin.

1. She brings her own handcuffs.
2. She can Taser people teasing you.
3. She knows how to parallel park.
4. She can shoot the squirrels off the Cherry tree herself.
5. She investigates all strange noises in the middle of the night.

In you head, stealing your bright ideas.

It’s not called child abuse because I came out of Britney Spears’ vagina.

1. Spooky But Not Too Spooky Black.
2. Wildly Asexual Orange.
3. Dead Rebel Green.
4. Chock Menstruation Red.
5. Grandma’s Thighs White.

I would love to see you lick yourself but I have to go to school now.