Scudfish

And in that moment I realized why fat guys drive Harleys.

1. Sub-prime loans.
2. Housing prices plummeting.
3. U.S. dollar sinking (especially when Feds lower interest rates).
4. Oil an gold prices rising.
5. George W. Bush is learning to pronounce Tehran, Ahmadinejad and nucular.

The doctors always said I had special talents.

I love her because she is easy to grab and  hang on to.

1. Box of photographs featuring seemingly complete strangers.
2. Brown, gray and dark green fall and winter coats.
3. Bobbsey Twins books.
4. Miniature silver plated 5 piece tea set given out at gas stations in 1954.
5. Cheap paintings and small cheap prints of cheap paintings.

We were not the brightest… Intelligence-wise.

I used to be hounded by a flying Basset hound when I lived in the ghetto.

1. Tampon.
2. Retardation.
3. Skidmark.
4. Facebook.
5. Nucular.

Only had one of my shiny balls left.

My bad… I won’t crap on your lawn again.