Scudfish

Turning porn in to erotica using windows.

Lolz! Umphghhhr… Hi Hih.

1. Finding tiny little shiny things in your extremely hairy shag carpet.
2. Eating Pillsbury dough using a straw, or a plastic baby-feeding spoon.
3. Selling your wife’s panties on eBay or to the crazy and scary guy two blocks down, that always offers to mowe your lawn for “almost nothing”.
4. Beating up that hairy and buff, annoying, know-it-all-shit-faced-bastard, that learned his facts while surfing the Web — while high on Meth.
5. Finding a way to tell Smacktards to shut the hell up!

Invisible domination.

Very popular in the guy’s locker room.

1. Do you mind if I bring down your garden shed using only my wife’s favorite tool?
2. I love beach volleyball… It’s fun! How about if we play the next game without using our hands?
3. Honey, are you asleep again? Honey? Honey, I think it’s turning blue…
4. Look, baby! Mini-me is able to lift our Queen-sized bed off the floor!
5. Baby? Hellooo? Love buns? Look, I can do this really cool thing to our Ford Focus’ tailpipe…

Partying by myself with heroin but without socks.

Looking for a woman who enjoys sucking on a pirate with a big ear.

1. Ahhh…
2. Mmm…
3. Yummmie…
4. Who is that fellow holding the bowling pin?
5. Mommy, come see what your son-in-law is doing to me!

I am happy today because I am not flaky light tuna.