Scudfish

1. A large Meat Lover’s Pizza for a year’s supply of Cashmere premium quality bathroom tissue.
2. Six pairs of Wal-Mart tube socks for an “I’m With Stoopid” t-shirt.
3. Handful of glass beads in different colors for a vintage “Maria-Rosa — The Cleaning Lady Love Doll”.
4. Partially eaten McDonald’s Sausage Egg McMuffin for a partially eaten “AAA” Rib Eye steak.
5. Battlefield Earth DVD for some rat poison or an Archie comic book.

Roofied — She is napping but her pussy is ready to go.

I hate my old dry self.

1. “Itsy no mine…”
2. “He statted it…”
3. “Taught it was me moms…”
4. “Dunno notin bout notin…”
5. “The hoe stabbeded me afta…”

The Death Star — 114344 militay personnel. 36132 family memeber. 1430 cooks. 983 Dry Cleaners. 124 hairdressers. 3 clowns. 1 tap dancer. They are all dead now.

It’s the closest to a  threesome I ever got.

1. Pencils on my desk…
   One pencil in my eye —
   blood drips like spring rain.
2. Zippo December:
   burning the lint off my socks —
   power outage fun.
3. Silly choking death:
   killing two birds with one bite
   and nothing to drink.
4. Botox injections
   just for fun and all over —
   no legs to walk now.
5. Dangling morning balls:
   a scary target on a
   Pit Bull Terrier.

Match.com — When you are looking for someone very special.

Loves his bling.

1. MC Sooup God.
2. MC Donalds.
3. MC 2-2-2 Nice 2 Stutter.
4. MC Humpty Dumpty.
5. MC Buttcracker Stew.

Dishes — It is less work than sinking a battleship.

Cool and cooler still.